Really Funny Clean Jokes - A cold day in hell

A new arrival in Hell was brought before the devil. The devil told his demon to put the man to work on a rock pile with a 20-pound sledge hammer in 95 degree heat with 95% humidity.

At the end of the day, the devil went to see how the man was doing, only to find him smiling and singing as he pounded rocks. The man explained that the heat and hard labor were very similar to those on his beloved farm back in Georgia.

The devil told his demon to turn up the heat to 120 degrees, with 100% humidity. At the end of the next day, the devil again checked on the new man,and found him still happy to be sweating and straining. The man explained that it felt like the old days, when he had to clean out his silo in the middle of August on his beloved farm back in Georgia.

At that, the devil told his demon to lower the temperature for this man to -20 degrees with a 40 mph wind. At the end of the next day, the devil was confident that he would find the man miserable. But, the man was instead singing louder than ever,twirling the sledge hammer like a baton. When the devil asked him why, he was so happy, the man answered,

“Cold day in hell, the Falcons must be in the SuperBowl!”

Really Funny Clean Jokes - Mike Tyson One-Liners

Tyson’s psychologist told Mike to take a year off. He obviously misunderstood. Good thing he didn’t say two.
Evander after the fight: “Maybe I shouldn’t have told him to ‘Bite Me’.”
Tyson’s favorite football team: the Tampa Bay Buc-an-EARS.
For the third fight between Mike and Evander, Tyson wants it to be held in Earie, PA.
They are making […]

Really Funny Clean Jokes - A guy named Bob

A guy named Bob receives a free ticket to the Super Bowl from his company. Unfortunately, when Bob arrives at the stadium he realizes the seat is in the last row in the corner of the stadium he’s closer to the Goodyear blimp than the field.
About halfway through the first quarter, Bob notices an empty […]

Really Funny Clean Jokes - The baseball demands

Top Baseball Player Demands
From Late Show with David Letterman; Friday, August 12, 1994
In case anyone has od’ed on O.J. Simpson coverage or for those who might for some reason not know, the major league baseball player strike began today.]
No team flights on Continental Airlines.
Goodbye boring baseball hats, hello festive sombreros.
Make […]

Really Funny Clean Jokes - Short Cowboy jokes

Q: What do you call a drug ring in Dallas?
A: A huddle.
Q: Four Dallas Cowboys in a car, who’s driving?
A: The police.
Q: Why can’t Michael Irvin get into a huddle on the field anymore?
A: It is a parole violation for him to associate with known felons.
The Dallas newspapers reported yesterday that Texas […]

Really Funny Clean Jokes - Jets Fan Dog

A guy walks into a bar with his pet dog. The bartender says, ‘No pets allowed.’ The man replied, ‘This is a special dog. Turn on the Jets game and you’ll see.’ The bartender, anxious to see what will happen, turns on the game. The guy says, ‘Watch. Whenever the Jets score a field goal, […]

Really Funny Clean Jokes - Real marine

A little boy walks into a public restroom where a marine is taking a piss. He
says to the marine: “Sir, are you a real marine?” Yeah,”, the guy replied, ”
Would you like to wear my hat?” “Yes, please!”, says the boy. So he puts on the
marine’s hat. A sailor walks in. The boy says, “Sir […]